Entries in shame (1)
The Balancing Act: WoW and Shame
Playing video games, any video games, is a pretty time consuming hobby. Sure, us gamers generally get more bang for our buck than movie or comic aficionados, but they are able to toll out their free time to a myriad of content. And that is just in the time it takes us to finish a single game, a single player game at that. Once you throw in titles with deep multiplayer experiences (hello World of Warcraft) the trouble really begins. In this world time no longer exists. The hands of the clock are fleeting pieces of plastic ever hoping to outlast the motor that propels them. Now, in a universe focused on social interactions, seconds, minutes and hours lose their meaning. /played simply measures the "real world" as it passes us by. Here in the world of Azeroth, time isn't measured by some arbitrary atom's ability to spin around some other small object. It's measured in levels, loot and achievements. But the real world is ever flowing. It doesn't simply stop while we are medulla oblongata deep into a session. Which causes this addict to feel a ting of remorse, a microgram of deceit, a swath of regret, and even soul crushing shame on certain occasions. An all too common occurrence:
Wait, what was that noise? Was that the door? Oh crap, I think I feel footsteps reverberating through the house. Creaks of floorboards! Heavens no, she is headed this way. She is coming up the stairs! Don't panic, you've practiced this. Okay, the toon is in a safe place. /quit to leave the game and it is all good. Schnickies, I forgot to accept the confirmation. The doorknob, it's spinning. Close dammit, why won't the window close! Oh dear C'Thun, the door is opening! Must distract her with something...a ferret! /me tosses a ferret at Ms. iTZKooPA as she rounds the corner to the desk and peers at my screen. A screen full of articles, websites, GIMP, research and not a single game in sight.
End Scene.Most of the time I can pull it off, but now and then I get caught. Busted in the middle of an instance, chatting on Ventrilo, messing around in Dalaran or the Auction House or continuing to push Solidsagart to level 80. But you know what the cold, ironic fact is? She doesn't care. It's all me. I am the one who puts this sense of guilt upon myself. Me. I don't spend ridiculous amount of time playing video games, especially when you consider that it is part of my income, and yet I hide it. I get most of my playtime in when no one is around, when the house, couch and speaker system is mine. I'm becoming a closet gamer (only the act of gaming, I'll discuss it till I am horse), and I don't know why! Does anyone else game in a vacuum? Could I be getting self conscious (finally) in my "old" age? How do you hide your WoW from those around you?